Synopsis – The Deadly Seducer

On 21 April, 2014, in Book, by Cindy Pivacic

‘THE DEADLY SEDUCER’                                                                                by Cindy Pivacic

Deadly Seducer - Front Cover A5 640

It is all about you if you can live with yourself, stuff everyone else! I understand fully that it is a serious, terminal disease but it is manageable, so try to keep your sense of humour and “Deal With It”, sounds simple, but for some it will not be, that is why I would like to share the more positive side of my experience. It is not some, feel-sorry-for-me memoir or a sad biography – I usually pick up a biography, read the back, say “oh hell no” and put it right back on the shelf.


This is just telling it how it is and how I had to deal with “IT”. I have had the most exciting life possible, no regrets. No one is untouchable, although some people I have met have the strangest ideas about “IT”. This can affect anyone, directly or indirectly, and eventually someone else’s situation will affect you.


Forty six year old, Caucasian woman, so much for Gay and Black stereotype, HIV and AIDS is my disease!


A brief look at a ‘normal’ youth spent in Namibia then going to a boarding school as there were no high schools in Oranjemund to my fathers transfer to Kimberley and the teen years of growing up and testing the waters of what teenagers get up to along with their peers. I come from a very healthy well balanced background which goes to show everyone is vulnerable no matter your standard of living.


My first and second marriages were disasters for very different reasons; the first fortunately brought me two wonderful hard earned children but due to the lack of affection from my husband they had to be meticulously planned. The second husband was a violent individual and totally opposite of my first husband the physical side was passionate entwined with both violent abuse and sexual ardour.


Deciding to move from the Free State to KwaZulu Natal seemed like the best thing at the time in order to remove myself from my second husbands family and then in time from him, unknowingly setting myself up for an even worse situation. Being the trusting person I am totally misled into a relationship with someone fourteen years my junior resulting in a lifelong deadly disease.


Living with the HI virus and acquired diseases related to HIV/AIDS since 2004, the lengthy detailed treatments are shared in the hope that it will create awareness to the public at large and show that acquiring the virus does not have to mean a death sentence. We are all going to die, eventually; it is just up to each one of us how you are going to live in-between, disease or no disease!


With support, yes, from family and friends believe it or not it has helped somewhat in removing the stigma and discrimination attached to the disease and with proper assistance and support the stigma can be overcome. By pointing people in the right direction and advising what to do, where to go, when and how to do it will hopefully prolong their life by managing their disease.


The treatment takes the reader through the various stages of acquired diseases that affected me and by doing this give people hope that acquiring diseases such as Strokes, Pneumonia, Shingles, TB Meningitis and Cancer (Angioimmunoblasticlymphadenopathy) will show them that living a healthy lifestyle can and does work. Going onto ARVs need not be a nightmare if taken correctly; they will enhance your life.


The lack of support within the suburbs is frightening and is addressed with contact details to counselling, testing and support group facilities. Add to this some tried and tested, easy, healthy recipes, the first thing that always gets asked is ‘So, what do you eat?’ necessitated this inclusion.



The thirty-six FAQ are easy to understand and an integral part of creating awareness and giving information to the still unacquainted people of South Africa in a manner that encourages them to want to read and find out more about this disease.



It boils down to ADAPT or DIE, I chose to adapt!


‘The Deadly Seducer‘                                                                               Blurb by Charlotte Kemp



‘A bold and honest account, Cindy Pivacic shares her story about how she came to contract HIV & AIDS and how she responded to it.


Not only is she living healthy years later, but her vibrant and energetic character has been poured into helping others experiencing the same situation.


Cindy presents talks and workshops on living positively with HIV & AIDS and those, with this book and her online presence, gives her the opportunity to create awareness, give testimony concerning the HIV & AIDS issue, and to assist in de-stigmatising this secret killer’.




The Deadly Seducer

On 10 May, 2013, in Book, by Cindy Pivacic

Back and Front Cover Final 640


A bold and honest account, Cindy Pivacic shares her story about how she came to contract HIV & AIDS and how she responded to it. Not only is she living healthy years later, but her vibrant and energetic character has been poured into helping others who are experiencing the same situation.

Cindy presents talks and workshops on living positively with HIV & AIDS and those, with this book and her online presence, gives her the opportunity to create awareness, give testimony concerning the HIV & AIDS issue, and to assist in de-stigmatising this secret killer.


Account Name Cindy Pivacic – AID My Journey
Account Type Flexi Account (Book Account)
Account Number 925 85 006 77
Branch Code 632005 (Pinetown)

Price R150.00 + R30.00 postage & packaging (R180.00) South Africa

Delivery 4/5 days

Courier Service counter to counter additional R 75.00 = R225.00 (SA) next day
Door to door additional R130.00 = R280.00 (SA) next day

Your name as reference
Email proof of payment
Your delivery address to:

Thank you.


I am on a mission and dare you to care.


I suppose you think you don’t know anyone who is HIV Positive……..Surprise, Surprise, how wrong you can be?


This may well be the most important item you read today.


It may possibly be your neighbour, your best friend, an aunt, your brother, a cousin, a colleague, parent or even YOUR partner! Anyone could potentially be HIV+, yes, true story.


The fact of the matter is, you do know someone, and they may just not have disclosed their status as yet. Why? Because of the prejudice surrounding the virus and we all hate to be “judged”, don’t we?


You may be thinking; how does this affect me? Well, I personally put my fear in my pocket and made it my mission to make others aware of the pitfalls and the available support by sharing first-hand knowledge by undertaking to do talks and presentations around the country, adding value to individuals as well as group counselling, to those open enough to be concerned, gain knowledge and NOT judge.


Because of the nature of the virus, I have experienced the emotional and physical turmoil of my HIV positive status. I was never offered any support to speak of and had no idea where to go. I literally felt my life had fallen out from under me.


My mission is NOT to allow these regular people, just like you, to live with that outlook and fear. Without pointing fingers, which we know does not change anything; frequently find these human beings are unable to finance the cover of a consultation and receive the support they so badly require before going back into the world, misinformed or untutored, living positively or negatively without pre or post counselling.


It is still heard that the ‘black and gay populace have ‘AIDS’, how sad Mr & Mrs X. The HI virus is widespread throughout the human race, be it White, Black, Indian, Coloured or the rest of the human race.


No-one goes out purposely to get infected, trust me! Nor did I, it happens, be open, take heed; it could be someone close to you next time. If this message is not continued out there, with a 1000 new infections daily, it’s a possibility/probability that this trend will continue. Prevention and support can only be achieved with the participation of the community and nation at large.


By showing your support and empathy to the cause, you could assist in maintaining the many projects structured through the counselling centre, based in and around the country which remain vital to the wellbeing and survival of many people whether face to face, social media or through telephone access.


The counselling centre is based in Pinetown, KwaZulu Natal, started in January 2011 and has been sustained by my family and close friends, however, the time has now come for the lease to be renewed for a further 12 months and we wish to continue sharing the message. By requesting your assistance to what may not be your problem, but a cause that you too could support, we anticipate giving hope to many.


To make a difference in some small way, please find attached a Debit Order Form that can be returned to the below listed details or find the bank details for a once off donation.


Feel free to share this email, much appreciated. Having shared our message we thank you in advance for your support.


Yours sincerely,




Cell: 073 73 96 044

Fax: 086 56 46 935

P.O. Box 763



NPO 093-243



Skype:                                   cindy.pivacic

Twitter:                                 @cindypivacic


SSETA Accredited HIV Skills Training (US 13915) – IEC Facilitator – Speaker – Counselling – Trauma Debriefing – HIV Activist – HIV Skills Project Management – Workshop Facilitation

FNB – Westville


Account Name                AID My Journey Support

Account Type Cheque    Account – (non-profit)

Account Number            6233 080 2712

Universal Br Code          250655




Account Name              AID My Journey-Support

Account Type Savings  (non-profit)

Account Number           9266 809 550

Branch Code 632005     (Pinetown



(An opportunity for schools/scholars to also get involved)

Support our Skills Initiative Projects sms the word ‘THINK’ to 38665 to donate R10.00


On 12 September, 2012, in Health and Wellness, Resource, Uncategorized, by Cindy Pivacic

I find it intriguing and somewhat overwhelming that so many people are eager (admirable I might add) to support a cause. On one site over 6,290 people ‘like’ the page of a beautiful animal but when it come to the human race, that’s us; you, me, your brother, sister, mom, dad, aunt, uncle, cousin and the list goes on, are not nearly as important a cause to support.

Is it FEAR, ignorance or just plain……………’s them not me?

What has happened to your compassion for the human race, pray tell, I would love to hear.

I can guarantee you, you may not know it but someone you know IS living with the HI virus but because they are fearful of rejection they choose not to share their status with you.

Eventually they find themselves in poor health with nobody to turn to and guess what? They seek out others like themselves and hope for the best! OR they also become…….EXTINCT.

Not everyone has ’brought it upon themselves’ as some will warrant their lack of support by saying.

My question to you is; what’s hidden in your closet? (before you judge, think!!) We all have something we don’t want let out of the bag. Yours is just different to mine and theirs 😉

There are organizations out there like AID My Journey-Support that are trying to be a sustaining force  and empower individuals during this unplanned phase of their lives, don’t think it will not affect you, it will in the long run.

I hope those of you that are so benevolent and concerned enough will think about your fellow men/women that also need your enormously generous goodwill.

What are you going to do?

If anyone would like more information I have some projects that I wish to get up and running which will assist in people being able to have skills to generate an ongoing income for themselves and their families.

Project 1:        Computer Skills Initiative

Project 2:        Training Support Group Facilitator Course

Thank you for taking the time to read this. May you share the care!

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Join Cindy at Ekhaya Guest House on the 24th April 2012 @12h00 - 14h00In order to maintain the ongoing success of AID My Journey-Support and create awareness in the community this forum is designed to enlighten you around the HIV and AIDS issues in your community.

 Cindy says; The topic is targeted at the health care professionals, however it should also be applied to the public, without your effort, and acceptance the health care professional’s job is pointless.

What is your take on this matter?

Combating stigma, isolation, stereotypes, and discrimination.

By showing, their own support and responsibility to care for all people, regardless of their health or social status, health care professionals can act as role models for others in helping combat stigma, discrimination, and isolation of people living with HIV/AIDS. Prevention strategies will become far more successful when HIV is treated like any other disease, and when people feel safe to be open about their HIV status. However, health care professionals can become advocates for acceptance and care only if they look inward and first examine their own beliefs, values, assumptions, and attitudes towards HIV/AIDS. This can be done individually or in groups by asking and reflecting on the following questions (WHO, 2000a:6-5):

  • What fears or misunderstandings do I have?
  • How might these fears misunderstandings affect my work?
  • Where do these fears or misunderstandings come from?
  • How can I overcome these fears or misunderstandings in order to provide care support, counselling, education, and advice in the prevention and care of HIV/AIDS?
  • What influence do I have on others who care for people who are infected and affected by HIV/AIDS?
  • What is my role in providing and promoting safe, moral, and ethical care to people living with HIV and their loved ones, caregivers and communities?

 Health care professionals should also think about and listen to the language they use when they speak: prejudiced language may alienate them from their target group. While saying ‘He caught AIDS’ and ‘He has AIDS’ may mean the same thing, the first sentence is loaded with negative meaning that betrays the implicit attitudes of the speaker. (Such a negative meaning may be that AIDS is something that we the, innocent, have no control, something that we ‘catch’ from ‘them’ – the contaminated ‘others’) People often say ‘He is HIV’ instead of ‘He is HIV positive’. A sentence constructed like this implies an identity with the virus, i.e. the person is the virus instead of the person has the virus.

 AIDS educators should also be careful not to use sexist language. Always to refer to he and him in the context of HIV/AIDS may imply that men are always the ‘guilty’ party. Victimising language should also be avoided. Instead of saying, ‘She suffers from AIDS’ one should rather say ‘She lives with AIDS’ or ‘She is HIV positive’. Rather than referring to ‘rape victims’ use positive language and refer instead to ‘rape survivors’. Be careful not to fall into the trap of using prejudiced or discriminatory language. If you refer to people with HIV infection as ‘those people’, you are clearly dividing the world into two groups: the innocent, healthy us and the guilty diseased them.

While we all sometimes think in terms of stereotypes, we should make every effort to be aware of our own stereotypes so that we can root them out and thus avoid offending others and hurting feelings. If we interact with a group, we will quickly learn to recognise our own prejudices and eliminate them.

The irrational and often exaggerated fears associated with HIV/AIDS can be directly addressed through educational programmes based on sound medical, social, and psychological knowledge.

To be successful, such programmes must be sustained and supported over time. Prevention strategies will continue to be compromised if fear, ignorance, intolerance, and discrimination against HIV-positive people persist. Healthcare professionals have a responsibility to help ‘normalise’ HIV in the communities where they work so that modes of transmission and prevention can be addressed without the emotional and attitudinal values that are currently getting in the way of open dialogue.

Counsellors and other healthcare professionals should not only ‘advocate for Universal Precautions, but also tolerance and knowledge about HIV/AIDS’ (WHO, 2000a6-4).

 (HIV/AIDS Care & Counselling – Alta Van Dyk 4th Edition 132-133)

Stereotypes, prejudice and discrimination

  • Stereotypes are frames of reference or patterns of expectations that strongly influence the processing of incoming social information. A stereotype is usually an oversimplified, one-sided, and relatively fixed generalisation or rigid view of a group, an individual or certain activities or roles. An example of a stereotype is the belief that all members of certain groups share traits or characteristics.
  • Prejudice is a negative attitude to members of a group, based solely on their membership of that group.
  • Discrimination refers to negative behaviour or actions based on prejudice – it is prejudice in action.

        (Baron & Byrne, 1994:218-219).


STIGMA Definition of Stigma – Stig´ma

n. 1. A mark made with a burning iron; a brand.
  2. Any mark of infamy or disgrace; sign of moral blemish; stain or reproach caused by dishonourable conduct; reproachful characterization.

Oxford Dictionary

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